James’ Poor Brain

Because everybody’s doing it! Only mine will be bigger and better than everyone else’s.

Section 1: Christmas

- What was the fruit that had trapdoor-opening properties in Doctor Who: The Christmas Invasion?

- Which indie-rock band recently recorded a song called “A Great Big Sled”?

- What other major religious holiday takes place around Christmas?

- Which supermarket chain sells those delicious-looking roast potatos in Goose fat?

- Which religious group banned Christmas in the Middle Ages?

Section 2: Music (guess the song these lyrics come from)

- “Can you see the Joker flying over, as she’s standing in the field of clover”

- “Royal Candian blended, the spicy aroma hath mended me”

- “My Kielbasa Sausage has just got to perform”

- “Everybody’s bought our seventh album, it has outsold Michael Jackson”

- “Pappa was a copper and her mother was a hippy”

Section 3: Me, you and real-life stuff

- What will I be doing on Sunday, June 17th 2007?

- Who recently threatened to commit AaronLeecide in a PE lesson?

- How much is 3 cookies and a hotdog in the school canteen?

- What is the funniest thing Sarm has said in recent memory?

- What period (not lesson) was this said? (NO PLANNERS ALLOWED!)

GO!

This is the only line I know from King Kong. Hopefully I will see it some day, but I haver a long list of films I want to see, so it will have to wait behind Casino Royale.

Anyway, after watching Jonathon Woss friday night, I felt the desire to express my liking of Mr Jack Black. He is truly my favourite actor/comedian/musician (although only when you combine the three). Not only has he starred in (and I quote) “numerous Hollywood blockbusters”, such as King Kong, School of Rock and, er, The Holiday. He is also at the co-helm of hi-larious accoustic metal band Tenacious D, who I have mentioned many times before.

He also has a face that has the ability to make you erupt into laughter simply by pulling a unnervingly wide smile. This has happened to me twice now. Thesecond time was on Friday, but I still remember the first time:

JB, on Kerrang TV: And so here it is, the number one Jack Black video, voted for by you- Tribute.

(camera zooms in veeeeery slowly for about 15 seconds on his charicaturistic face, his mouth almost spanning his entire face, as I roll around the floor).

You can tell its near Christmas when you go round someone’s house will the sole intention of putting up Christmas decorations.

That’s Abbi today, and Ben’s tommorow. There are going to a lot of glittery floors in Swindon this weekend.

In other festive news, I have committed a deadly yuletide sin and have started feeling, shaking and , on occasion, listening to presents addressed to me. Hey, I’m only human. Anway, so far I think I have:

- Some kind of bottled liquid, most likely shampoo or shower gel

- a CD

- Something that is so blatantly deoderant they might as well give it to me now, as I would bet the rest of my presents that’s what it is

- Socks. But its ok! I actually asked for socks, because (much to my family’s amusement) I have a specific brand and type of sock I like to wear. Specifically, M&S sports socks, black, with the little grey circle on the side

There is also something fabric-like that I thought was more socks but has no cardboard or anything rigid in the wrapping. Interesting. It will require further inspection.

Rargh. I’ve lost the USB cable for my camera. It is now useless until I find it/give up and buy a new one.

But who cares, because for the first time this week I have spent my evening doing things I enjoy- going on the computer, listening to some good music, playing a little Shiny Bass Guitar- and NOT revision, writing or generally worrying about stuff.

In fact, a glance at my planner reveals I have no coursework, mock exams or even basic homework until 8th January. Now THAT’S awesome. Almost as awesome as I felt after metaphorically kicking German coursework in the balls and running off laughing. Saying that. I’ll almost certainly get a C or below but screw it, I finished it and I’m happy with it.

Damn right.

Also, the title of this entry comes from ’Raoul’ by The Automatic, which was just on and was catchy. I also realise the tremendous irony releting it to the actual blog content

On a much more positive note, outside of school I would find it hard to be happier. Christmas is almost here, Wolfmother is stuck in my head, I’ve discovered the genius that is Weird Al Yankovic, and of course I have very awesome (albeit sometimes high-maintainence) friends, and one very very very awesome Abbi.

Yep, evenings and weekends are great.

To quote Joey from mildly rubbish Friends spin-off Joey: Everything is lining up to screw me!

I’m fairly certain I’ve done this rant before, but its so annoying that teachers are completely oblivious to our lives outside their subject. I don’t think Ms Crerar would appreciate me telling her I couldn’t do my petty, insignificant history homework because I was too busy with Physics coursework, German Coursework and a BCS mock (which turned out to be pretty easy, but you get the point).

Speaking of German, an open question: why the fudge do we have to do it? Why would we go to Germany without any german-speaking books and start talking about the amount of sport centres in Swindon?! And why is it so frikking hard to memorise?!?!

Albert Einstein (he was german, right?) must be spinning in his grave.

I’m sad. My eyebrows are very big and I do not like them. Whenever my fringe is lifted up, it reveals two things that resemble the microphones attached to high-tech TV cameras.

They even scare Mr Thomas. He said, hypothetically, he would not believe I did not write on the wall because my two friends were similar to those of The Hood, the baldy villain in Thunderbirds.

I could always get them plucked out, maybe for charity or something. But Joey on Friends did that and he looked really stoopid afterwards, so no.

…That Video and DVD sales make up 40% of a film’s total profit?

Interesting, that.

(This is how little I have to blog about right now)

Well, Christmas shopping is finished. Sorry in advance if I’ve got you something you either already own or somthing you will get no use out of. But the love was there.

Anyway, better news comes in the decaration that I will be seeing Muse again (with Abbi and Jenny, unless she has to go Furnace) in June next year, at the rebuilt Wembley Stadium (the first confirmed music event after it is expected to be finished, PLUS Muse’s biggest show ever). Good stuff, although the rumoured new songs have not yet surfaced…

Its a conspiracy I tells ya. Anyway, I’m off to start wrapping……oh wait, where’s my 50 Cent album?

…

Badum tish.

And not a moment too soon, I might add. But yes, the bass guitar equivalent of Sophie’s Ewoks or Abbi’s Mendel is n my house right now!

…

Did I mention its in a box, completely covered by duct tape and I’m not allowed it until December 25th?

Oh, bugger. (slumps into depression)