The Big List of Little Things I Hate
1- iPods. sTupid nAme, aNd oVerhyped, oVerpriced mP3 pLayers. sO iT pLays mP3s - bIg dEal! sO dOes mY pHone. iTs nO dIfferent tO aNy oTher mP3 pLayer oN tHe mArket, eXcept tHe mAssive pRice tAg. oH, iTs nOt sHockproof eIther, sO iS mOre pRone tO bReaking.
2- Video Blogs. Imagine all the boredom of the average “and today I did this yadda yadda…” blog, but with the added pain of having to look at someone’s ugly face as they generally force a bored expression when talking about something they don’t like and forcing..well, the exact same face when talking about something good. Yawn. What a waste of YouTube bandwidth.
3- The phrase “Don’t get me wrong”. It’s generally used by stupid/racist/narrow minded/intolerant people in a vain attempt to seem less stupid/racist/narrow minded/intolerant by saying something that contradicts whatever stupid/racist/narrow minded/intolerant thing they’ve just said before adding “but I just…” and then repeating said stupid/racist/narrow minded/intolerant bullshit. Example:
“Don’t get me wrong, I respect the beliefs of other people, but I just think WHAT they believe in is a load of degenerate shit”
Fuck off. It means nothing.
4- The fact that Firefox won’t let me copy and paste.
5- Stupid parents who forget about their moron kids and let them do moronic things, then blaming someone else, instead of doing their job as a parent. Grow up.
6- Anything that’s in NME these days. Especially Jack Penate.
7- Rickenbacker basses. I don’t really know why. They’re just ugly and sound like trebly pieces of shit. Basses should be so low they empty the bowels of listeners. Although I quite like Lemmy’s custom design, so I’ll make an exception for that.
8- The Killers. They keep popping up on Kerrang TV for some reason, like finding thumbtacks in a bowl of Weetos. Except most of what they show is rubbish as well. HelloGoodbye, for example.
9- The word “fooking”, or putting stars where swear words should be. Just say “fucking”, you retard. I won’t tell Mummy.
10- Activists. Of ANY kind. There are few things that are likely to induce severe bouts of yawning than people trying to convince me I should be vegetarian/Pro-choice/pro-life/christian/jehovah’s witness/atheist/blood donor/pro-war/anti-war.
11- Fall Out Boy. Sounds like Busted, but with a clothing line. Except that lame song song where Pete Wentz “screams”. I’m not the best source on what “screaming” is considered to be, but what Wentz does isn’t it.
12- Pete Wentz, in general.
13- Speaking of shit music, Arctic Monkeys. Just, no. Fuck off. Get off my TV and go back to Sheffield, and learn to write songs that aren’t about doing The Robot. And wear your guitar lower.
14- Weird names for paint. I had to paint in ‘Oatmeal’ once. Oatmeal looks, smells and tastes so bad I could almost cry. One time I was at Alton Towers and someone threw up after they got off Air. It had the same texture as oatmeal, which didn’t bode well for my opinion of it. Here are some other ill-advised paint colours I just made up: Intestine Pink, Bile Green, and Ingrown Toenail Discharge.
15- the blatant hypocrisy of MSN.com. Despite having hosted internally-written articles about how reality TV should be removed from TV schedules, it continues to sell out to the “blithering idiot” demographic by having a regular Big Brother updates. I hate Big Brother as well, but who doesn’t these days?
